I Once Was a Warrior

Let me be honest, here. In Tonga, I never felt like I was saving the world or being a hero. I often felt as though my accomplishments were near-nil. Then there were times I felt Avengers-worthy heroic, like in these moments:
--The day I stood up to the First Lady of Tonga after she cussed me out. I told her to be nice and calm down.
--When I survived my horrendous bout of food poisoning. I didn't even cry the whole 7 hours I rid my body of corned beef and sketchy raw fish (probably for the best.) I did cry, however, when I talked to my mom the next day. There's something about a mom's voice when you're sick and far, far away. It totally doesn't take away from my bad-arse-ness, since I slowly walked to the nearest store (which was closed) to get my own Sprite. I looked deranged.
--The day of the Molokau Massacre. See blogpost for that one.
--Any time I killed cockroaches...with books, flip flops,and even my bare fist.
--When I killed Socrates. Haha. Lie. Even in his final fleeting moments, I still couldn't get within 5 feet of this bleeding, crawling rat. Total wimp day.

And that's where I am. I feel wimpy again. Not in a "ew gross!" girly way, but I am paranoid as hell. I've had nightmares about rats and molokaus, and I've woken up many times thinking a rat was crawling in the walls when, in fact, it was a limb scratching at my window. And once, it was hail.
I got out of the shower the other night, wrapped up tight in my towel since the basement is often an ice box, and I nearly bared myself to the world when a dried leaf suddenly morphed into a scary, 3-inch cockroach. I felt ridiculous.
Then yesterday, as I was playing the uke, I stifled a screech as a black mass appeared on my ceiling. It was a plastic hook that's been there forever.



I'm a mess. This, of course, is a very appealing characteristic to my sister and brother-in-law. Once, as Kelly had spilled the gooey blue laundry detergent in the basement floor, she said, "Jaaaaamie...I need help. Look at this!"

"Oh gah," I said, "It's a rat, isn't it?"

"WHat? No! Of course not. Just look." I slowly walked downstairs, waiting for Kelly to show me whatever the problem was. Before I saw the blueness spreading across the concrete, she said, "Watch out! Mouse!"
I screamed and grabbed her arm like a little girl.

Ronnie, her husband, has taken it upon himself to scare me at random intervals during the day--usually behind doors or at the most convenient moments, when I'm in Jamie-Land and unaware of the world. It's not really that necessary, though, since I've also sent myself into convulsions thinking a gecko was down my shirt (again) when, in fact, it was a tag. Really, Jamie.

I clean toilets at work, pick tiny bits of glass from my head, face, and chest due to working in the kiln room, and am confident in killing most insects.
Yet I'm a wimpy ninny haunted by rodents and centipedes on crack that have already perished at the mercy of my hand, foot, or, of course, rat poisoning.

I need to man up before I go adventuring again.

Getting Out There

Well herro, pals. This is hardly a blog post, but I want to incorporate as much of my "fullness" as possible in this thing, so you are guinea pigs for music. I'm primarily doing covers, but nonetheless, I'd like to share a bit of myself. Of course uploading the video takes too long and I'm entirely too impatient for that, so here's the link on youtube. Feel free to comment, criticize, advise, yada-yada. I want to practice as much as possible, and I'm hoping this will be a gateway into overcoming a bit of stage fright!

Thank you much, and enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAn0aS6gi7s

*ps: the strumming totally sucks at the beginning because I was trying to play louder, but it's just uncomfortable for me to do that. So I changed it. :)

Environments

Current environmental state:
--I'm in my bedroom at my sister's house in Louisville. It's a big comfy bed and I have four pillows. To my right is a GRE study book, my cell phone (yet to have voicemail, since I keep forgetting to make one of those.) I have a Cody McFadyen novel by my lamp, my notebook and a pen on one of my pillows, clothes in my floor, and hats, boots, and belts hanging on the closet door shoe-holder thing. I love sleeping with no mosquito net.
--A tissue box full but two weeks ago is now down to half its capacity due to my continuous Snotty McDroolface alias. I'm wondering how much blood coming out of your nose per blow is actually okay. This began on my flight back to LA.


Current state of affairs:
--I live with my sister and her fantastic family. It's fun to wake up in the morning to two adorable blonde nieces who throw down Cocoa Puffs in their cute onesie PJs and say, "Hi JJ!" Who knew I'd look forward to morning cartoons? (Unfortunately, it wasn't really my thing in my own childhood. Sad day, I know.)
--I have a job at a make/paint-your-own-art studio called The Artist in You. So far, I love it. I don't sit in front of a computer all day; instead, I greet customers, watch kids paint pottery, clean up after them, unload kilns, glaze stuff, make calls, la dee da. I even once pulled a small piece of glass out of my scalp! (Due to sanding down some sharp glaze.) It's really fun, to be honest.


--I've joined a gym. My sister is helping get my butt back in shape. My upper body strength is equivalent to that of my 4-year old niece who could pass for a two-year-old. My younger niece, Kendall, is definitely stronger than me.


--I went snowboarding for the first time last weekend. I'm pretty sure I bruised my tailbone. It was...fun? I enjoyed learning something new, and it was definitely awesome to learn from Kelly and Ronnie, but by the end I couldn't even pick myself up off the ground. In the last course, after crying once already, realizing my knee was three times its normal size, and being soaked through my shirts, I told my sister with weepy eyes, "I just want this to be ooooover." She was an all-star.
Luckily, my soreness has been replaced with that from the gym.
--I'm currently looking for a car. I'd hoped to just get a bike and use that as my be-all-end-all of transportation matters. But I've fallen into convenience mode rather quickly.

Current Entertainment
It's crazy how quickly I've developed a TV schedule. I've never watched so much TV in my life.
--Nightly Programming is as follows:
Monday: The Voice, followed by Smash
Tuesday: (formerly) Glee, American Idol, Parenthood
Wednesday: The Middle, Modern Family
Thursday: Awake, if I think it's as awesome as it looks
I also like to watch Big Bang and How I Met Your Mother whenever it comes on randomly. AND I'm catching up on Downton Abbey. It's fantastic.
Other entertainment forms include:
--Flipping my nieces onto the couch. It's really quite fun. They're like rag dolls.
--Lots of music, of course! I've even been asked to play/sing "Over the Rainbow" at a wedding this summer. Sah-weeet! I'm also planning on investing in a mandolin once my paychecks get to rollin' and I'm not as freaked out by loan and car payments.
--Watching my brother-in-law's saltwater fish tank. The coral reminds me of Tonga.

Well, friends, that's the update. Perhaps this sounds a bit like your own lives, which is why I've debated my motivations for keeping this blog. If I'm no longer int in third-world life anymore, will you still be interested?
Perhaps I'll have no more awkward encounters with men yelling "Hey baby," or of kids throwing sticks into my bicycle spokes, but I am in a new city, I have a new job, and am contemplating a strange haircut in the near future.
And, of course, I'll always have third world stories to tell.

Nofo 'a, Tonga

It’s 12:20am and my bed is crawling with ants. My heat exhaustion and sunburn is making me so delirious I keep thinking my shadow is a scurrying rodent. I have two best friends sleeping in other bedrooms—hopefully soundly, since we’re all burned and exhausted from a long day—and I keep jumping the ropes of emotional double-dutch.
I’m quite sad because I have two days left to drink coconuts, pick a vibrant flower from a random bush on the side of the road and pluck it behind my ear, finish paperwork, pack up everything in my house, organize my baggage, and prolong the goodbyes to all my wonderful friends in Tonga.
I’m disappointed because after nearly 16 months of Peace Corps service, mine has been interrupted by the universe or fate or just crappy luck. I feel as though my service never actually took off—my expectations were always in the way, I suppose, but after this second site fell apart, I tried my absolute hardest to secure another site—a supportive one—but it, too, fell.
I’m encouraged by all my friends and staff in PC because they’re convinced that this is my merging lane into another opportunity waiting for me. My Baha’I tutor, a wonderful woman who has more wisdom than any other early-30’s female usually has, told me yesterday, “You know, Jamie, when I think of you, I think of a butterfly. You just float around, flower to flower, knowing when it’s time to move and grow in the universe. And you have beautiful wings.”
I’m excited about future pursuits and endeavors—thinking about student loans and life insurance is a bit more than I can handle, but having the freedom to maneuver as I please without dressing in an oven-like skirt and stifling my opinions on politics, government, and gender issues is this beautiful source of fresh air just waiting to be inhaled. Ohhhh, I can’t wait. I may even drive a car the day I get back. Well, maybe not. (Cars aren’t my thing.)
When I first left ‘Eua, where I lived and taught for 7 months, I became very self-critical, nearly convincing myself that because I switched to the capital with vegetables only minutes away and water that ran every day, I wasn’t a real volunteer and wouldn’t have a legitimate service.
*Lessons Learned:
--I am not a martyr, nor should any volunteer go into service ready to martyr him/herself. It was almost a pride-thing. I’d write home telling of how I survived three weeks without running water or swap scary stories with other volunteers about rats or centipedes on steroids (molokau).
--A fruitful life has nothing to do with where you think you should be, but the people you’re around; the relationships you build; the community you join. Though I developed a wonderful community within Peace Corps, I unfortunately just started building a solid one with amazing people before it got cut short with this Interrupted Service.
--Such is life. I convinced myself I was MEANT to be here, but clearly I’m not. The ticket is booked, my house is packed, my suitcases are nearly filled, and my head is full of plots. I’ve got ideas and plans on strobe-light-mode, so I’m easily overwhelmed, slightly nauseous, and inconsistent with emotional responses, but my effort into coping with this drastic change isn’t so bad.
Then again, it also helps that I’ll get to celebrate my 24th birthday with my wonderful family, and soon after, watch The Hunger Games in a real theatre. Ohhhh, Clean Life, I bequeath my arrival upon you.

Look...I'm Not an Animation! (Merry Christmas, too)

Howdy folks! Couple things.
1. Sorry, I have ADD and can't seem to finish my next blog post.
2. I decided to make a Merry Christmas video and upload it onto here, BUT
3. Apparently the internet at the parentals' is just as shabby as Tonga...nearly.
4. So here's the youtube link for your Jamie dosage, only no animations.

Oh, wait. Here's one.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w2CxOgv7JUQ&context=C33ae504ADOEgsToPDskIxDIc4nVvtCe7V83zA6BoJ

Kilisimasi Fiefia!

Before My Bowels are Overcome with Southern Food...

Well, dear friends, as I depart tomorrow for a choreographical layover bonanza, this will be my last post in Tonga in 2011!
I'm sure once I've overcome jet-lag and have stopped shoving food in my eager face, I'll post something about my appetite, bodily functions, and my reaction to traffic.
Until then, I bid thee farewell! Kilisimasi Fiefia and have a wonderful holiday!

Just for kicks and giggles, here's a holiday picture card that Kaitlin and I had planned on making but then she left for New Zealand and so I just HAD to use my toddler drawing skills to create it via animation.
Enjoy!

Jamie and the Obnoxious List of Happiness

I just finished “Hector and the Search for Happiness” by Francois Lelord, a French psychiatrist who travels around the world and writes interesting philosophy in a self-help slant. But it’s not like reading Rick Warren or anyone else who sells their brand of philosophy/religion like the newest cleaning product on a Billy Mays infomercial. Lelord’s storytelling is like gelato—not so full of processed shenanigans, lite in form, but completely rich in flavor.
Anyway, in the book, Hector takes a much-needed holiday from France through China, Africa, and the States (referred to as the Land of More.) He observes people and asks them if they’re happy and why/not. His own experiences provide many of his lessons/observations, and he writes a list of learned lessons in his notebook.
So in the spirit of happiness, I’ve decided to make my own list of causes of happiness I’ve experienced from yesterday alone.
1. Happiness is getting a sweaty hug and kiss from the 2011 Tonga Triathalon Champion, who is one of my best friends. The smell went away eventually.

2. Happiness is having a pleasant flavor-surprise in your chicken Panini. (Like pineapples and a yummy tangy sauce, and mayonnaise not tainted with strange combinations of ketchup and other condiments.)
3. Unhappiness often happens when one feels uncomfortable; for example, when one prepares to go to a “Palangi” beach, which is closed, and then goes to a crowded Tongan beach and is unprepared with proper swim attire.

4. Happiness is a watermelon-eating contest, preceded by a seed-spitting contest, followed by a rind-chucking contest.

5. Happiness is an unexpected tuna sandwich with cheese.
6. Happiness can be experienced while making fun of an offensive rap song that makes you unhappy.

7. A refreshing breeze and a sun-kissed face cause happiness.
8. Soul Food Seasoning is the product of someone who knows how to make people happy.
9. If everyone made a “Soul Food” dinner once a week, we’d all be happy at least once a week.

10. “Soul Food” quiche makes a happy dinner with happy bellies.
11. Cornbread makes anything happy.
12. Salad is also soul food, which makes us happy in mind and body.
13. Sharing love of music is a fruitful way to make friends; music makes everyone happy.
14. Acquiring 5-weeks-worth of Christmas songs is a cause of happiness—especially in preparation for going home, where the weather will be COLD!!!!!!!