A List of Things:

I'm about to leave for a conseti (basically, a dance), so my time is a bit limited. So no paragraphs, here are random thoughts.
--I've now read 8 books while in Tonga. I tackled Cold Mountain literally within 24 hours. Is that sad?
--When I feel lonely in my house, no one comes. When I feel good about being by myself, people come, which is fine, but then they stay...and stay...and stay until I give up entertainment and just pick up a book. Then they stare...and stare...and stare. And try to make Tongan conversation that I don't understand, which leaves me to drop my book, pick up the Tongan dictionary, and try to figure out what my response should be. But it's a slow process, so by that time, the poor girl was trying to talk about something else. Frustration.
--I'm eating a lot of sugar. I should give away the rest of my candy...I ate all the good stuff :P
--I'm also cooking all the time. Kitchen appliances=freedom and happiness.
--I met a 13 yr old Tongan teen, a boy, who lives in New Zealand. However, he will stay in 'Eua for a year and go to school, and he's really nice. He speaks beautiful English and we had excellent an conversation about God, brownies (and our love for them,) and many other things like hiking and speaking Tongan.
--Tomorrow, I will be a Fatty McButterpants, as my friend Eden used to call me at Kentucky Wesleyan. I have been invited to 2 feasts. One begins around 1, the other around regular suppertime, I suppose. It should be interesting.
--I'm killing about 1 cockroach a night.
--I do dishes like someone with OCD would. Too bad my bedroom isn't similar.
--I'm in love with 2 little boys, both who are a month younger than my 2 nieces, Ella and Kendall. It's fate.
--Uike Lotu, Prayer Week, begins Monday. 2 services a day: 1 at 5am, the other in the afternoon. 'Oiaue (an expression of grief, excitement, or anything else resembling "my goodness!"), it could be a long week.
--I am craving Earl Grey tea. It's my favorite. And peppermint, too. mmmmm...
--Oh, how I will miss my mom's lasagna this New Year's Eve... faka 'ofa! (How sad.)
--I'm currently pigging out on Cadbury chocolate. Oh how I've missed chocolate.
--I can't wait to go hiking again!!!
--My next book will probably either be A Clockwork Orange or The Reader. We shall see...

Rat's Cave, Rainforests, and Bicycling with the Tevolo

One goal has been accomplished: I have finally hiked in 'Eua. Three other PCVs and I joined together in a long but pleasurable hike to seek this Rat's Cave we've heard so much about. After biking to the next village to meet with one PCV, we "hiked" the ravine to get into town, 'Ohonua, then walked a while before someone picked us up and took us to our final destination, the house of the other 2. From there we equipped ourselves and started on our little escapade into the unknown, Tongan-less.
Luckily, we ran across some kids on the long dirt road, what looked to be a frequented path, since 'Eua does have its share of adventurous tourists, and we kept walking. And walking. And walking. Finally, we made it into the rainforest where I suddenly found myself surrounded by ginormous ferns... see the picture for ginormous-ness.

To shorten a long story, to our knowledge, we never came across Rat's Cave ('Ana Kuma), and the boys who "led" us stopped at an interesting structure/what looked like a former concrete structure to swim in this structure's basement-looking thing. Of course this was all in nature, so no walls were apparent, but there were stairs underwater. I'd love to know the history of that place. Maybe Rat's Cave was near-ish. Anywho, we kept walking...and hiking some more...through mud (lots of mud,) bush, forest, creeks...
We decided to head back when there was literally nowhere else to walk. I'm not sure how far we walked, but it was pretty darn far. We finally got back to the house, ate lunch, had our weekly tea time, and shared stories, philosophies, ideas, and finally, books! At this moment in time, I'm not really doing anything...school isn't for another month, so I spend a lot of time at home when I'm not eva'ing through the community.
I just finished my last book I brought--an amazing "Radical" by David Platt, who is a pastor in Birmingham, Alabama. I finished it today, and it really re-boosted my spiritual blaise-ness that I've had the last couple of months. I finally feel enthralled to do something here... rather than just teach English, learn Tongan, and do other menial community-integral things, I want to really dive into my village, figure out the needs, and really sacrifice things. My stress level, my need for alone time, and even possibly my vacation savings, if I can actually DO something to help someone.
Even in the Peace Corps, following a set trend is easy. Since no one is being sent to outer islands, it's easy to think that we are being put in villages that really aren't in such great of need. It's an argument, definitely, and some places have had volunteers for a while, but there's always a need.
Here, it could be awareness among youth AND adults with health, sex education, environmental education, mental health, etc.
The important part, too, is that even though I should make myself useful to them as a helping tool, I, too, need to be educated. For example, just last night, after a long long day of hiking, my friend and I couldn't find a ride back to our villages. We finally found her village's netball team, who played 2 more games before we left, but they gave us a ride nevertheless. However, we got to her house around 7:45 and I left on my bicycle with a basket full of books on an incline-only road back to my village. At night. By myself. Ughh.
Everyone--especially women here in Tonga--are very aware of the "tevolo", the devil, and always encourage female Palangi's to never travel alone... after all, we're single females...what kind of fight could we put up? (I say this with realistic sarcasm because as much as I don't want to admit it, I'm quite powerless if a crazy man approached me with a machete. Shoot, even without the knife. Tongans are big, yo!) So anyway, I'm peddling my little heart away, praying to GOD to not let the tevolo get me (remember, I'm really exhausted and even a bit delirious, with little food and my contacts drying up--and I can't see squat at night because there are no lights!), and after a scare of "seeing' something in the bush, I have to stop up the last treacherous hill. I walk up, reach the top, and slowly pedal to the gate of my school compound. I get in and want to collapse. I'm tired, my legs are custard (since jello doesn't exist here,) and after eating pineapple from the fridge (yay coldness!) and a bucket bath (boo for no running water!), I get into my childsize bed (my toes hang off the end,) I plug Damien Rice into my ears, and I stare. Stare some more. Even more.
Dog fights outside, the sound of little puakas (pigs) running by my house, and an obnoxious snorting horse are nature's lullaby.
But I can't stop thinking about me. It's a bit ridiculous, honestly, I mean I'm in Tonga working for the PEACE CORPS and I'm thinking about me. Narcissistic much? But honestly, I'm thinking about my purpose. What can I DO here? What tools do I have? Are my motivations still good? Am I selfish for wishing for a real mattress rather than a 3-inch foam pad? Yes. Am I silly for being bitter about not having a cold shower that actually works? Maybe. (After all, 2 days ago, it worked.) Am I the unfortunate wishful thinker for wanting a box of Belgian chocolate? Sure.

But it will all work out.

Kilisimasi Fiefia!

I woke up to a persistent knocking this morning, just 5 minutes before my alarm went off. Don't you hate that? Like when you wake up just minutes before your day should start, and you think, 'MAN, I could sleep three more minutes, dangit!' and you force your little eye curtains to block out the start of a new day.
That was me this morning, trying to communicate telepathically to this door-knocker to PLEASE, go away. PLEASE, come back in 10 minutes, when I've at least had time to roll myself out of bed and brush my teeth!
Then I remembered: oh wait, I'm in Tonga. If someone knocks on your door, they knock until you come. Fortunately, I had a considerate door-knocker who didn't call my name every 5 seconds. That's what they do here. If they need you, they call a monotone "Seini. Seini. Seini. Seini. Seini. Seini" until you answer. (Seini is my Tongan name. I like it :))
So I begrudgingly swung my legs over the bed, pushed away the cardboard boxes from my door (to keep away the mice and stinkin' cockroaches...I killed one roach last night. Ick.), and tiredly padded to the door. I unbolted the lock, gently opened the door, and there was this beautiful teenager smiling at me, saying,
"Merry, Christmas, Seini!" as she handed me a GINORMOUS plate of food. On top of this lovely pile of sandwiches (tomatoes and butter, usually), sausages, cookies and crackers was a beautiful, sprinkled piece of chocolate cake. I instantly salivated. I said mumbly thank-you's--I had nearly forgotten it was Christmas!-- to my nice door-knocker, shut the door, and instantly went to the sima vai to get water to boil for tea. After all, you can't have a breakfast like that with no tea!
Since that much food can put anyone in a good mood, I decided to open up a package from my parents that I had received yesterday. I saved it so I could have something to open on Christmas...and the first thing I pull out from this beautiful heap of candy is a stocking! It really is Christmas, woohoo!
I got a nice dose of the Christmas spirit yesterday, when I called my parents. I wished my mom a Happy Birthday (which is today, in America), and asked my dad to read me Twas the Night Before Christmas. It's an Ogles Family Tradition for we kids to cuddle next to Dad on the couch right before bed on Christmas Eve as he reads the adventures of Santa that we've heard every Christmas Eve night since I can remember. As he read it on the phone, I found myself silently lip-syncing the words and nearly tearing up. Oh, the affect of Christmas when you're without your family.
But yesterday was a great day. I rode my pasikala (bike) to the next village to see a PC friend, and we literally hiked to town to buy food for tonight. We took a shortcut into a ravine and seriously--it was like rock climbing. I have to take pics soon, because you won't believe me. I promise. The way back was even trickier, balancing a bag of eggs in one hand, groceries in the other... Ohhh, Tonga.
Last night I stayed up preparing the pasta salad I will take to our PC Christmas dinner, and after I eat with my Tongan family, I will go home, rest a little, and then make the potato dish my sister and I make a lot. Potatoes, onions, peppers, and salt. Sadly, I don't have the Parmesan cheese, but it's okay. Garlic salt may have to substitute.
Today, after my crazy large breakfast, I put on my faka-Tonga getup (like the one in my Facebook profile picture), and went to the Wesleyan church in my village. The singing... holy cow. I understood very little of anything in the service (though I heard "Jesus", "reason", "joy", lalala), but the singing made me feel absolutely high in my spirituality, which was a nice change. It's hard to feel spiritual in church when you don't understand the sermon, but thank goodness singing is universal. I think I'll sing Christmas songs to myself, too, when I go home. I can play "Oh Holy Night", "Away in a Manger", and "Silent Night" on the uke, so that should be nice.

I do wish I had my computer and Christmas movies, though. Faka 'ofa. (How sad.) Here are some of my favs:
-Love Actually
-The Family Stone
-Elf
-Meet Me in St. Louis
-It's a Wonderful Life
-Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (that's mine and my sister's Christmas movie)
-White Christmas

So tonight, when you're doing your last-minute present-wrapping (which is my absolute FAVORITE part), your last-minute stocking-stuffing, and maybe your tradition of opening once Christmas present on Christmas Eve or reading the Jesus story or reading the Night Before Christmas, please do one (or all) of the following:
-Watch a Christmas movie with your family
-Belt out a Christmas song in the shower... preferably a Mariah version
-Bake Christmas cookies...and eat them. All of them.
-Pick out your favorite ornament
-And think of me!

That's all. Have a wonderful Christmas, everyone! I hope it's a white one!

Why I Love Tongans

Since it's summer break down in the Pacific, life pace is a bit slow. I'd had enough lounging by lunch yesterday, after my rice exploded onto my stove, so I decided to get some essentials from one of the falekoloa's (store) in my village. I'd met the faifakatau (shopkeeper), a sweet old lady, the other day while I moseyed through, so I decided to repay a visit.
I bought $15 worth of groceries, and I swear she gave me $20 worth of fruit. 1 melon (oh yeah, they have watermelons here! It's awesome!), 2 faina (pineapples), and a HUGE bundle of bananas.
Tongans are awesome.

Later in the day, I went to the town officer's house (I swear his family may adopt me soon) for dinner, which was kumala Hawaii (my fav.), a slab of fried fish fillet, and a lobster. It was pretty darn 'ifo (delicious), so I went back home feeling good about food. I decided to attempt making bread like my host mom in Ha'apai did...
in a nutshell, it didn't rise and I put too much oil in, but I added some flour and decided to make something cinnamon-y. I thought about the Amish cinnamon bread my mom used to make, but it seemed way complicated in my head. Plus the dough was already mixed and there was no way I could mix in other ingredients...plus, I had no eggs.
On a whim, I mixed cinnamon and sugar together, rolled out the dough on a plate, and sprinkled the cinn-sugar onto the dough, rolling it up, and slicing it into my little baking pans.
My accidental cinnamon rolls came out decent, so this morning I boiled some milk and sugar for some icing...a bit clumpy, but it tasted like...milk and sugar icing.
So I had some delicious tea with cinnamon rolls this morning for breakfast. And that is the tale of my accidental cinnamon rolls. :)

Tales of a Tau'olunga Dancer

I feel that I'm being sparse on details. I'm living on a tiny island in the Pacific, have been here over three months, and I wonder if you can actually picture me here. It's a bit difficult, I'm sure, because I have posted zero pictures, but hopefully this will help. Here are my tales as a tau'olunga dancer.
First of all, tau'olunga means a solo dance. If you google pictures of Tonga, you may see women in strapless "dresses" with shiny skin. Well, my friends, I have been that woman three times now. I actually considered ditching this whole Peace Corps idea to become a professional tau'olunga dancer, but things didn't work out. However, it is fun, and if you have a sense of humor, fluid hands, and can dance with a constant smile on your face, the tau'olunga is for you.

Preparation Time:
First of all, you shouldn't be shy as a tau'olunga dancer. Women will have your clothes off in seconds, and suddenly you may find yourself being wrapped, pulled, and prodded in vala (clothes) of tapa cloth (you should Google this, because I can't explain it and I'm too much in the zone to create a link and/or research it myself) or possibly a dress of sewn leaves, Adam and Eve style. Once you are decorated with anklets, bracelets, kahoas (necklaces) and a matching kiekie, these fast-moving women can pin your hair and have the little head-band (3 Musketeers/faka-Tonga style) towering above your coiled bun and immediately get out the baby oil for skin-smothering time. They coat your neck, chest, arms, back, hands, and even legs to give your skin that shiny, sun-kissed look.
*Side note, the oil is actually so the money will stick.

Go-Time:
The band (or letio/radio) starts. The Tongan blends of guitar and ukulele (and maybe a makeshift bass...I'll put pics of this up later,) fill the room, and you softly step in 2 counts, alternating your steps with your gently curling hands. Then you bow (if you have a partner like I did, make sure you bow in sync!) and begin. After one or two verses (which the band will repeat...over and over...and over), people begin to approach you with colorful bills (the blue ones are always exciting...it's a $10!), and they aren't so shy in sticking. Some will put them under your faka-Tonga headress, others will stick them in the fold of tapa cloth beneath your pit/near your boob (I once found a $10 in my bra...and got really excited), and some will just stick the bills on your arms or back. Eventually, they will fall off, but the male dancers that dance behind us are to pick up the bills during/after the dance. When we danced at the PC Swearing-in Ceremony, we made over $80! We were ballin' that day.

When the Party's Over:
After the dance is finished, you can decide to keep the money or give it to the band. The first time, we gave our money to the woman who made our traditional Tongan apparel (see my Facebook profile picture...it's the yellow thing I'm wearing!) The second time we performed in Ha'apai, in my host village, and we gave the proceeds to the band. This last time, we kept the moolah and celebrated that night!
As for clean up, the women are just as quick undressing you as they are dressing. They get out towels and hankies to efficiently wipe off the oil, and suddenly you are fully clothed in your original get-up.

How to Really Have Fun:
Tongans love it when Palangi's (white people) do traditional Tongan things, and Tongans love humor. So: it is totally appropriate to make a fakakata (joke) while dancing. For example, during the tau'olunga with my group, in the last set of verses, I joined the boys and danced quite crazily. It creates lots of laughs and even may produce more money! :D

Day 2 of 'Eua Adventure

First of all, let me apologize for how mundane my blog looks. It's all black and boring, so sorry! I'll try to upload pictures if/when I remember to bring my camera over to the town officer's house/my only source of internet.
I spent last night at the TO's house because the village is worried that I will have 'ilifia (fear) because I'm the only one currently living on the school compound, which is technically outside of town. But it's only a 3 min. walk to the TO's house, and I like the location...there's a huge open field in front of the house, with bush in the background...and a fence to separate my house and the bush. My house still needs a little work, but it is clean and huge and beautiful! The curtains are almost finished, and I'm hoping to get a gas tank for my stove/oven! I want to bake so bad... And as far as food, I'll be set because the TO's wife said I could come over for any meal, anytime. Tongans love feeding we Palangis. Yesterday, she got teary because she didn't have "Palangi food" and was afraid I wouldn't like Tongan food. She was happy when I told her in Tongan, "Oku ou sai'iataha kumala mo lu mo pele! Sai pe 'ia!" (My favorite is kumala, lu, and pele leaves! It's okay!)
Kumala, by the way, is the sweet potato here...it comes in white and purple, and though everyone says they taste the same, kumala Hawaii (the purple kind) tastes better to me. Probably because it's prettier. Lu is meat with onions and coconut milk stuff wrapped in leaves and cooked in an 'umu, the outdoor underground oven. Pele leaves are like spinach, and they are excellent and easy to cook with coconut milk and any vegetables or meat.
Today will probably be busy, but maybe not quite as busy as yesterday. A PC staff is here, thank goodness, because she makes things easy for me! She's helped me with SO much and has worked her booty off to get my house clean, organized, and taken care of. Later, we'll go to town so I can pick up some last minute things for the house... I hope to stay in it tonight!
Yesterday I checked out the school, since it's a rock's throw away from my house. It's pretty cute, and I will be one of 3 teachers--which I'm kind of excited about! It's a primary school, and I think I'll teach Classes 3-6...I'm not sure how the structure of time will go, but I guess we'll see! When I peeked in the classrooms, everything looked very thrown together...I'm pretty sure the library is on a couple of benches in the messy room, so I may have some projects to tackle! But I still have a month before school starts, so hopefully I'll have my ducks in a row before the madness begins.

Holy 'Eua Hills, Batman!

I'm currently at my town officer's house and I'm lucky. Most of 'Eua's internet is either sucky or nonexistent, so yay! I flew in this morning on an 8-seater plane that was so full, I sat in the front with the pilot! It was crazy awesome. The flight took all of 10 minutes, which was awesome, and I was greeted with fast-moving clouds that flirted with the hills and hiking extravaganzas of 'Eua.
I'm home! Woohoo!
My house is absolutely giNORMOUS. I wasn't expecting it at all. The town officer and his family are wonderful, wonderful people, and they offered to let me stay in their extra bedroom because I'm a single Palangi and they didn't want me to have 'ilifia (fear.) But I told them I was malohi (strong) and wasn't afraid. They still have to install a few things in my house (security wiring in the windows, some updates to water and my sima vai/water tank supply thingy). Other than that, I am home and happy!
I hope to go for a hiking adventure tomorrow with the other awesome PCVs here...there are 5 of us total, and we're a bit spaced out, but the island is about 14 miles long if I'm thinking correctly, with one main road, so it's all ridiculously close in American standards. However in Tonga, time and space and distance is a bit different.
My next moves are to get everything unpacked and organized (should be interesting, since those are 2 of my least favorite things to do,) and to get acquainted with this adorable town I live in. I think as of now, I will have bucket baths in stead of showers (faka 'ofa), but I can deal with that.
I think Christmas will be spent here with families and church, but hopefully dinner will be with the other PCVs, Palangi-style! (Only without the presents and Santa Clause hoopla.) I can't believe Christmas is less than a week. 'Oiaue!

Swearing-In, Site Change, and I Got Hit by a Car Today

Don't be alarmed. I mean, I did get hit by a car today. In the most menial sense possible. My friend and I were walking to the a-MAZing bakery here in the capital, and there were cars on the sidewalk so my steps were on the side of the road, like everyone else. Then suddenly, my whole arm flies forward from the propelled force of a frickin car who couldn't scoot over 2 inches! I mean, it's not really a big deal. He just clipped my wrist, but wow. Maybe I'm just a chronic arm-swinger. I totally am.

In more important news, I am officially a PCV! The Swearing-In Ceremony was Wednesday and it was pretty awesome. I did my single-ladies oil dance again (we made over $80 total!), and I helped lead the National Anthem. Fun times. As of yesterday, I found out that my site changed from an all-boy's college on Tongatapu to a Goverment Primary School (GPS) in 'Eua, a small island south of Tongatapu that is notorious for its excellent hiking! (Sweeeet...my hiking boots are itching to emerge!) So since everyone left today to go to their sites, my change was very last-minute. I found out that my house has no fridge or stove, and that I needed a bike (and a fan, of course...it's Tonga. Heat is the staple product here.) so I spent $1300 in one hour. My bank account is weeping.

Anyway, I am absolutely thrilled about my site change. I had some reservations about the all-boy's school...gender issues are huge here, and I had such an uneasy feeling, despite my great homestay experience at the site. But all is well now, and I cannot wait to visit a whole new island! Now I wish I would've paid attention during all the Primary Education sessions we had during training...hmm...

PS: If anyone is interested in sending me a package, here are things I need!

--Any teaching tools! Markers, crayons, paints or brushes, anything creative! Coloring books, construction paper, scissors, BOOKS(!), etc.
--Mosquito repellent...it is expensive here (Off! brand is nearly $20 pa'anga), and the stuff we get free here isn't very effective. I am mosquito food.
--Anything that is efficient for cooking. Spices, special utensils (I have basics), special pans (I have one frying pan, one sauce pan, one bread pan, and a 9x9 cake pan).
--Skirts! Flowy and light is best, and color doesn't matter! Black is good for funerals, but colors are so much fun... and get cheap ones! Please :)
--I desperately need a new Nalgene-ish water bottle... I lost my first one, adn my second one is metal and tastes funky.
--Any books. I love books. :D
--Feminine products would be great...!
--Olive oil
--Pictures!!! Send me pictures of you guys... and notes and cards are greatly appreciated!
--CANDY! For the kids, of course.... :P

I just ate a ginormous cinnamon roll for $1

My cinnamon roll was deliciously topped with chocolate and shredded coconut. I never wanted to live in the city, but I'm glad it's just a busride away. The bakery here is spectacular.
I just spent a week on Tongatapu where I was at my site for 2 days, then I spent "Attachment" with another volunteer and another trainee, who is a pretty awesome friend. We have this whole ESP power between us--it's glorious. Anyway, my attachment was great! I stayed with a girl from Virginia and the three of us had amazing conversations, laughs, and food! We had a noodle soup night, a pizza night (also with caramel pie and ice cream...ifo aupito!) and last night her neighbor cooked a feast and invited us, too. Here are some things at a typical feast:
'ota ika (raw fish), kumala (sweet potatoes), puaka tunu (roasted pig), ika fakapaku (fried fish), keke (a cake but different...some cook it in an umu, which is an underground, outdoor oven). There are many more things, but I'm tired and I can't think at the moment.
Oh and by the way, a typical Tongan feast is like the total dream of Fat Bastard from Austin Powers. There are lines of tables and at each meeting-point of each table, there is usually a roasted pig. Around the pig is--literally--STACKS and STACKS of plates covered with saran wrap. These plates are FILLED with different kinds of food. Luckily, the feasts I've been to had utensils, but faka-Tonga style is nima pe (just hands).
Anyway, we arrived in the city this morning, where all PCTs will be for a few days to complete our training. This includes a policy test and an oral language test. Tomorrow we plan to walk to a cool resort island (assuming the tide is low enough... which it's supposed to be), bask in our Palangi-ness (even though swimming is illegal on Sundays.) This afternoon we will debrief about our site attachments, then we are going to Carols by the Sea...by the sea, haha. It's all Christmasy and such, so it should be fun. Tongans love to hiva (sing), and I've heard Christmas songs on the radio since early Okatopa (October). However, the brightness of Christmas isn't prevalent here. We'll see random Christmas lights strung in random houses or porches or businesses, but the whole celebration thing doesn't happen here. Some families have feasts, but most just have a typical Tongan meal with their families and go back home to mohe. The week after Christmas is called Uike Lotu (Prayer Week), where many churches hold services every day; everyone is expected to live quietly and use the week to pray, obviously. Even though daily services under the direction of a man I won't understand sounds boring (and will be...especially since I'm at a Wesleyan schools and Wesleyan services tend to be verrrrry long), it'll be a great way to integrate into the community.

Getting Used to All the Pink:

11-10 (a poem)

My house smells inescapably of fish--
the raw, pink kind, even after they're
all fried, with sizzling white eyes
and stiff tails cooked to brittle ends.
I'm getting used to the fish smell
and scars,
little and big gashes and patches
on the eyes and noses and ribs and legs
of the dogs that escort my daily walks and the pigs
they chase and bite.
I'm getting used to the pink interruptions
in the fur, getting used to seeing so much skin
of animals--
so much that I'm more aware, more conscious of my own skin,
My growing herd of freckles,
noticing that my always-hidden shoulders
and breasts are looking pinker, whiter these days
as my arms and face golden with melanin
and freckles; I believed freckles were angel kisses,
once.
But kisses are pink and swollen with comfort and heat,
soft,
yet the heat toughens here and the pink is long gone
with my gag reflux at the smell of fish
and the escaped gasp at the sight of pets.
Sometimes pink outlines a cloud or two,
but I would drop my backpack, my
agenda; I would sacrifice the chance of
suspicion to dig myself in the sand
and be risen by that beautiful black sky that makes my chest tighten
like no man;
to chase the stars with my tiny eyes; to absorb
the cold sand bed with my palms,
to hear the waves sashay,
and to hear my little escorts pawing and playing
in the shore beneath the coconut trees that lazily reach
to caress the freckled, scarless belly of that great
blanket we only give three letters.

Na'a ne 'alu (a) Tusite (Tuesday's Gone)

I just had a lunc of PBJ and crackers with chocolate chip cookies. I hope we get pineapple and mango soon. This morning I woke up at 6:10 (I always hit the snooze once, then my friend texts me to see if I'm awake,) then I got ready and walked to a farther village with 2 friends. It's hard for me to walk slowly for exercise (very faka Tonga). When we got to the village, I ran back to my village. It felt great..i hope to sprint soon.
I got back, took a glorious cold shower, ate big egg sandwiches for breakfast, then called Kelly. I was SO happy to talk to Ella and Ronnie! It was awesome and I miss them but I'm still pretty thrilled to be here too.
Today's language lesson was fun-- we learned body parts and played fun and hilarious games with naming and drawing the body parts...even the fun ones. Tehe.
So last night I rigged my mosquito net. It took forever, but it's up. It could use some improvement, but I'm not touching it until it's proven ineffective.
Today I realied I've lost weight. I would guess btw 5-10 pounds. My nice black skirt once zipped up at my wist, a couple inches above the belly button, but now it zips below. Some friends told me my face and stomach looked thinner... the boobs have definitely shrunk. I don't mind that so much. Mostly they just get in the way, anyway.
It's a beautiful day otuside and I don't want/need to nap, so I hope to 'eva (wander) to the matatahi (beach.) :)
Oh, I found a dead cockroach under my bed...almost dead, anyway. I finished him.

Bugs: 5 (stupid mosquito attacks)
Jamie: 3 (3 cockroaches)...one with the back of my brush, one with my uke. Squish.

Food Cravings:

10/28

Grilled Cheese
Brownies
Chinese Buffet
Chocolate. In General.
Biscuits
Ice cold milk
Fried apples
BLT
Wine. Oh, what I'd do for some Pinot.
Milkshake
Guacamole
No-bake cookies
Corn bread
Corn
Fresh green beans
Desserts in general that aren't cookies from the falekoloa (store)
Sweet tea
Juice...esp. Cranberry
Nutella
Homemade peach jam
Bacon
Real American pancakes
Sushi
Salad with Italian or Vinaigrette
My dad's burgers
Heinz ketchup (they have Del Monte here)
Cinnamony things
Seasonings for meat
Chips and salsa

Attack of the D-Monster

Oct. 20th

I nearly shat myself today. So far, I've had diarrhea 6...7 (?) times today. I kinda lost count. Other than th ewhole twisted-coil stomach thing, I feel okay. I'm not getting homesick for Mommy-comfort, although some Saltines and Sprite would be excellent right now.
I've never really felt homesick before, and I guess it's a bit of a blessing. My host mom takes great care of me, and I don't feel shy to poo when nature calls. I mean... it's part of life. I'm in Tonga so who cares? I really did almost poo my skirt, though, walking from my LCTF's (Language and Cultural Training Facilitator) to home. It would've made a great story. PLUS I have to wear black for the funeral, so there would've been no visible skid marks.
My brain went to abort-mode during language class, so I made myself productive at home by learning "Zombie" on the uke--it's cool! A little high, but once my throat is normal, it will be sai 'aupito 'aupito. (Very very good).
For our Tonga Day Culture Project, my group has decided to teach the kids "Do Re Mi" from the Sound of Music--I'll be Julie Andrews with the uke. I also have to make a kiekie, 'ota ika (raw fish with coconut milk and such), and an American dish.
I'm kinda likin' this skanklihood I've got going on. I haven't taken down my braids for a day and a half and I probably won't shower til tomorrow afternoon. Because of the funeral I am rotating 2 black shirts and 2 black skirts. It sucks to apply baby powder because I end up with white sifts and fingerprints all over my outfit. It's Wednesday now and I have to go Goth until Saturday. It could be a smelly week.
I just hope I don't get lice. My middle sister has it, and it gives me the willies.

Another Journal Entry

Day 2-- Oct. 8

I can't wait to tell Mom that I woke up to roosters between 5 and 6 this morning. My sleep was in and out--my poor roommate was quite nasally and snored worse than my sister. Like 100 times worse. My mp3 came in handy, but now I need to find my adapter in the mass chaos of my red duffel rolly suitcase. I attempted organization this morning. Not my forte. My stuff seems to have morphed into the substance of rice, expanding with all this heated moisture that leaves my red rolly duffel suitcase lumpy with expansion and my throat raw with the night rain and breeze.
*Note to self: email parents.
We walked to a Chinese restaurant last night and it was great--a girl from Tennessee started rattling off Mandarin and I stared at her with amazed sleepiness. I'm battling a little insecurity but it's not so bad. Many people here can speak other languages, but it's cool. We're a great group.
It's very comforting and natural--who knew?
*Note to self* Congratulations for fixing your watch, you little genius, you!

Update-Cramming... New Posts to Come Momentarily

So my amazing brother bought me a beautiful leather-bound journal from B&N so I can document my adventures as a PCV in Tonga, so I will catch up the weeks lost by typing some of my journal entries. Enjoy!

Day 1-- Thurs, Oct. 7

In the past 24 hours, I've experienced a Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. The 10 1/2 hour plane ride from LA to Samoa to Nuku'alofa (abode of love, by translation) messed with my inner clock, my stomach, and my ability to focus in a room full of Tongans. The stomach has made more gargling sounds than an over-stuffed pool drain. The ride totally messed me up as far as food/digestion goes. Ick.
When we landed in Samoa, it was humid but beautiful with one side full of sea and the other full of mountains. We were there for a very short time.
--Awesome airport welcome
--Kava ceremony--it tastes like a liquid tree (because the root is from a tree)
--Walked to sea, saw 13 islands
--walked with pigs on dirt road
--"Palangi! Palangi! Hello!"--cute Tongan kid
--bashful kids on road were surprised when I greeted with "Malo e lelei"
--lots of compliments on my Tree of Life necklace...thanks Aunt Laura!
--feast with purple sweet potatoes
--I realized I forgot my brush and shirts I intended to bring
--Huge friggin spider in shower
--new nickname: "Kentucky"
--still haven't called home
--dancer with oil and money

Just Add Coconut Milk

Greetings, American-lings. Sorry for my extended alienation from the communicative world, but I am alive and well, about 10 pounds lighter, much more freckly, a bit more blonde, and slightly more faka-Tonga (Tongan). I am back on the main island (Tongatapu) as of yesterday, when I flew in from Ha'apai as the ending of my PST, pre-service training. PST included 4 weeks of language training and 3 1/2 weeks of technical (education) training. It was a bit tiring and slightly overwhelming at times, but it was amazing! My host family was sooooo great!
Here are some brief hilights of my time on Ha'apai:
--My morning exercise (fakamalohisino) was accompanied by 3 great lady friends, a hilarious pack of dogs, pigs that the dogs loved to chase, and occasional chickens that squawked at our Palangi (white people) intrusion.
--I now speak a Tongan-English creole mix. Just wait until I talk to you on the phone. Then you'll understand. Or maybe you won't understand. Tehe.
--I sang in church with my host family, who I call the Von Trapps faka-Tonga. (Like from the Sound of Music.)
--My house was very Palangi...running water from the sima vai (water tank that Australians donated to all Tongan houses), a sink, a cold shower (which is great in such hot weather,) and 3 ovens! The ovens are because my former host mom is the bread baker for Foa, the island. She's pretty terrific.
--Baking was a huge event for my village group...pies, cakes, fried rice, potato casserole... my mom also loved it, because I taught her new recipes and gave her a journal of recipes for a going-away present!
--Tongans cook many dishes with coconut milk, and it is ifo aupito! (very delicious)
--I've probably swallowed a decent amount of small bones of fish and chicken and mutton because boneless meat does not exist here.
--Lava-lavas (sarongs) are ingenious. They are great for lounging AND going to the beach. Here, unless you're in the capital, you only wear pants/long shorts for fakamalohisino (exercise...remember?) :)
--For Thanksgiving, we Peace Corps Trainees and staff had a feast and it was great. My group made caramel pies, sweet potato pies (used with the delish purple sweet potatoes here...the pies were so pretty), a strawberry/yellow marble cake, and brownies. We were a hit.
--I've sang and played ukulele more here than I probably have my whole life, if you can beleive it. It's great though!
--For culture day, our last day in Ha'apai, I did the tau'olunga, basically a single ladies' dance. I wore tapa cloth, which pretty much turned into a strapless dress that they had to pin so my huhu (boobs) wouldn't fall out, and I was coated in oil so passers-by/supporters of the dance could stick money on me. Oh yeah, I rocked it. I'll post the video as soon as I can.
--My PC friends here are AMAZING!!! I have friends from all over now...so when I go back, I can tuh-ravvvellll, woot woot!
--Surprisingly, there are more midwesterners and southerners than far-Westies or North-easties. It's definitely not what I expected.
--There are 26 PC trainees (future volunteers...as of in a week and a day!) in our group, Group 76.
--I have a friend from Maine! Isn't that exciting?!!
--Coconut water is brilliantly awesome.
--I have a cell phone... please let me know if you want my number!
--Tongan choirs are great....a bit loud sometimes when they scream, but all around, it's awesome.
--I nicknamed my former host dad "mui mana", which translates to 'butt thunder." You can probably understand why.
--I'm constantly debating whether or not to cut my hair. Surprised?
--I can't believe it's almost Christmas. Holy moly. Hot weather and coconut trees do not communicate Christmas to me.
--Research "kava ceremonies" in the Pacific Islands... I will probably talk about it in the future. In a nutshell, I was a toua, which means server.
--I've read two great books, one is "The Left Hand of Darkness" by Ursula Leguin...my friend Whitney (whose wedding I was supposed to be in in Oct.) gave it to me, along with a million other books, and I loved it!
--So far, I've gotten two cards and one package. I've sadly not written as much as I thought I would during training, but I will have lots of free time in January, so hopefully i'll get more letters out!
--I have an awesome traditional Tongan outfit that my host family had made for me... it's a yellow with a top and tupenu (traditional skirt thing) with sea shells, turtles, and a kava bowl on it. Super cool.
--Google 'kiekie' or 'ta'ovala'. That's what we wear every day.
--It is now weird for me to see a guy in pants. I often do a double take.
--I have sexy tanlines on my arms. Really sexy ones.
--I wake up every morning to roosters, who, despite what you see in movies, do not only crow at 4-5 am. They also open their obnoxious beaks at 7 and 8 and 9 and 12 and 2 and 5 and 7 and 9... I friggin hate roosters now.
--I've been to one putu (funeral), and it was interesting. I have a video for it, too.

That's all I can think of now. In really important news, I will be sworn in (assuming all goes well...which means passing the oral Tongan exam and the policies test) on Dec. 15th, so my service starts Dec. 16th.
*Just a side note, I can't tell specific info. such as names (without permission) or my specific location. Oh, and my views and opinions are not the views and opinions of Peace Corps. I kind of had to do that.

Peace out, homedogs. I shall update soon, I hope!